The Co-Sleeping Debate
One of the biggest topics in motherhood is co-sleeping. Those sleepless nights often lead to endless Googling, research, and a battle with your own beliefs. No matter where you stand on the issue, let me share my journey—it might spark some questions or thoughts to help guide your own decisions.
My Initial Resistance
When we brought home my daughter three years ago, I was adamantly against co-sleeping. The hospital was 100% against it, my husband shared the same sentiment, and many online resources proclaimed that co-sleeping equates to “bad parenting.” Naturally, I aimed to get my little nugget to sleep in her bassinet—I didn’t want to be labeled the “bad” mom.
But let me tell you, that girl DID NOT want to sleep on her own. She wanted her mommy, and her mommy was TIRED!
Sleepless Nights
Despite my fatigue, I was determined. I spent countless nights holding that sweet girl, trying to keep myself awake while freaking out every time I felt myself drifting off. I binge-watched Grey’s Anatomy in the wee hours, paced around the room, and Googled how long it takes for a baby to learn to sleep independently.
The Struggles of Sleep Training
We tried everything to help her sleep. From different swaddling methods (both arms in, one arm out, you name it) to various swaddle types, even experimenting with and without a nuni, what we call a pacifier (which was a big NO for her). We attempted to put her down after she fell asleep, as well as when she was slightly awake—nothing worked for longer than about 10 minutes. She wanted her Mommy!
Who was I to deny her that? Eventually, we realized that not sleeping wasn’t the answer. We all needed our Zzz’s, so we decided to give co-sleeping a shot.
Our Co-Sleeping Setup
How did we approach it? My husband and I used separate blankets and pushed the bed against the wall (leaving no gap between the mattress and the wall). I slept in a C-position with a blanket no higher than my waist. Baby girl was closest to the wall, then me, and finally, Daddy. We even used our Alexa to play white noise, and just like that—hello, 2-5 hour stretches of sleep!
It was life-changing. I felt rested enough to care for our household, Daddy was well-rested for work, and baby girl was happy with her nighttime snuggles.
Embracing Change
Was I nervous at first? Yes. Would I change what we did? Nope! In fact, when our baby boy arrived 18 months later, both my husband and I were much more open to co-sleeping. While we still tried to get him to sleep in his bassinet (he was a better sleeper earlier on), we were more willing to bring him into bed on tough nights when he just needed a little extra love.
The Ongoing Journey
When did we stop co-sleeping? Technically, we haven’t. Our little ones primarily sleep in their own rooms now, but they still occasionally end up in our bed. My daughter is currently scared of the dark and has started having nightmares. We lay with her until she falls asleep, and if she wakes in the middle of the night, we happily invite her back for some snuggles.
As for our little man? Knock on wood—he’s still a great sleeper, falling asleep on his own in his bed and staying asleep almost every night.
Share Your Experience!
Now that you’ve heard my journey and what worked for my family (and what didn’t), I’d love to hear about your experiences! Do you co-sleep? What techniques have you used to sleep comfortably with a new baby at home?
Every experience is special and, more importantly, your own. You rock, Mama!
XO
A Realistic Mom
A Mom’s Reality 